Guest post for SA mom blogs – Being a mom

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I recently wrote a post for SA mom blogs called Being a mom.

Unfortunately there were some misinterpretation and it started a mini-twitter-war on the correct definition of a mother.

I know there are different ways to become a mother (giving birth, adopting, marrying someone with children, etc). I became a mother when my baby was born (that is the perspective I am writing from as it is the only mother-experience I have). Being a mother, however, is much more than that in my opinion.

I was trying to make the point that all the every day things mentioned in the post makes you a mother and not just giving birth as the Oxford dictionary defines a mother.

Please see the comments on the post for further clarification.

What do you think makes a mother a mother?

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3 thoughts on “Guest post for SA mom blogs – Being a mom

  1. Rolene, I am not a mom and should probably recuse myself from the discussion. However, I am a woman and one with a deep compassion for all living things, especially children. I agree with the sentiment you try to convey in your post. It is obvious (to me, at least) that you view a mother as much more than a mere biological birther of a child. I have seen the immeasurable suffering of children who are neglected and/or abused by adult caregivers- whether it be a mother, father, family member, teacher, mentor…these caregivers do not in any way conform to the idea of a “mother”, even if they do birth the child. Our view of a mother is highly colored by our own upbringing and experience of our own mother. To me, she is a fiduciary of our hopes and dreams, not merely one that provides food and clothes. She forms our characters, shapes our personalities and can place us on a path of success. I am very fortunate to have such a mother. A large portion of my character and world view has been shaped by her caring influence. She taught me to view the world through a lens of compassion and tolerance. By no means do I always live up to this, but she also taught me to accept my mistakes and forge ahead. She not only mothered and nurtured me and my brother, but all the children in the extended family. Her kindness has softened the hard knocks of life for many a cousin or friend of mine. She is a soft place to fall when the world seems dark and the first one to share in the joy when the light comes back. That, in my humble opinion, is a mother.

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